Release

Long, long ago in a galaxy far, far away as an almost starving graduate student, I whiled away the hours and earned a few extra dollars as a life guard. Being a life guard really isn’t that bad of a gig. Most of the time, you simply sit in a chair working on your tan, blowing the occasional whistle. While it wasn’t a hard job, I did miss the benefit of working on a tan. I just don’t tan, and my sitting outside was done under the sultry New Orleans sun. Notwithstanding, it wasn’t a bad way to spend my summers. Plus, I got the added bonus of teaching swimming lessons.

Now, most people wouldn’t count swimming lessons as a bonus, but I always did. Monday through Friday morning at 8 a.m. I could be found with five to ten small non-swimming children who had every desire to become fish. Hanging on to the side of the shallow-end of the pool, the deep end of the pool beckoned, promising hours of sheer summer bliss if they could but pass their deep water test. That was where I came in. My one job, in their minds, was to turn them into fish in a single lesson so that they might pass the deep water test and experience the pleasures of the deep end.

Most of the time, the sheer enticement of the deep end made my work fairly easy. Simple practices of blowing bubbles, flutter-kicking, and floating on our front and back were combined so that in the matter of a few short weeks, non-swimmers were glistening fish ready to pass the deep water test. But, every now and then I was met with a child that resisted the transformation.

I could always spot a resistant transformation coming my way. They were the ones that walked in big and tall pointing out the deep end to their friends and family, talking about when they were going to swim there, but by the time they had reached the shallow end they had somehow grown quiet and reticent. I think that their arms somehow developed “Mommy-velcro” and their grips became like iron. If they could be coaxed into the water, they almost certainly could not be coaxed off the wall. At best, flutter kicks and back floats were done with one hand firmly gripping the shallow side of the pool. Sometimes a foot was put up on the side for good measure. Before I taught swimming lessons, I did not know that you could leave indentations in hardened concrete. I am here to say that it is possible!

Needless to say, no amount of coaxing or promising of rewards could loosen their death grip. Days of side-gripping would turn into weeks. Mothers and fathers would become exasperated and I would begin to wonder if the transformation would ever happen. Somewhere along the way, usually near the end of the lessons, the grip would suddenly release and the transformation would begin to happen. Without fail, when I would ask my future fish what happened, they would always say, “You can’t swim if you are hanging on to the side. You have to let go.”

I wonder how many times my heavenly Father looks at me, waiting for me to utter the same words to him. I so want to swim in the deep end of his pool. I long to experience the transformation that will allow me to move about freely and with ease, but I find myself gripping the side of the pool. I find myself gripping onto my past failures, my old ways of doing things, my tired ways of trying to change, my faint memories of when things seemed to work. I hold on to these because they are all I know and they seem safe. I splash about, trying strokes with one arm and sometimes just one leg. I want to swim. I just can’t let go. One day I will. God is building a desire in me and desire is where it starts, a desire to let go and swim. Because, you can’t swim if you are hanging on to the side, onto my past, my fears, my failures, my old ways of doing things. If I want to swim, I have to let go.

A fellow traveler and future swimmer in God’s deep end,

Blake

What’s my next step?

We encourage you to consider engaging in the following as a way of handing off faith in your family.

Building trust in God: Letting go of how we have done things so that we might grip God and his ways requires a deep trust in the goodness and love of God. This trust rests upon the image of God that is formed in each of us. This week, consider making deposits in the lives of your family that build the image of a God who is good, beautiful, and loving. One way you might consider doing this is by blessing your children each day. You might say, “God thinks you are smart, kind, beautiful, important, and lovable and so do I.” The repetition of this or a similar blessing will build a deep and solid foundation that cannot easily be shaken, a God who is good, beautiful, loving, and trustworthy.

We encourage you to consider engaging in the following as a way of deepening your own faith.

Letting go: The only way to change is to let go of what we feel change looks like so that we might grip firmly to Christ. Often we do not recognize when we are gripping something other than Christ for we have assumed that God bring about change in well-worn paths. For instance, we often assume that God puts change on a timetable, ours. This week, consider asking Jesus to open your eyes to those attitudes and ideas about change that do not come from him. As they come to mind or as you experience them, offer a prayer indicating your desire to let them go, asking for the grace to act on this desire.